Selfies. Selfies everywhere
Oh no the first one is really cute
no one ever says that Rome needed help from aliens to build their empire
#l laughed for days when i found out that #ancient egyptians used water to reduce friction and move blocks for distances #and that this was literally DEPICTED ON THEIR HIEROGLYPHICS #but ~western archaeologists~ #thought that the pouring of water depicted ~superstitious rituals~ #jfc
strippers do it in eight inch stilettos
I think I have a pretty good body for someone who miscalculated this planet’s dominant indigenous species and had to construct this form as a last-minute assimilation effort.
Anecdotes by medical practitioners"A woman came in for a baby check with her 6-month-old and she had what looked like chocolate milk in the baby’s bottle. So he started explaining to her as kindly as he could that she shouldn’t be giving her baby chocolate milk. At which point she interrupts him and says, ‘Oh that isn’t chocolate milk. It’s coffee! He just loves it!”
"I had a patient come in for an STD check. She was very upset and continued to tell me that she only had one partner. Progressing through my assessment, she further divulged that even if he was sleeping with other people it shouldn’t matter ‘because he uses a condom every time and he makes sure to wash it thoroughly after every use’.”
"Had a lady who measured her baby’s temperature by pre-heating the oven and putting one hand in front of it while the other hand was on the baby’s forehead. She told the nurse her baby’s fever was about 250 degrees.”
"Lady has to have foot amputated and is given waiver forms to sign pre-op. Buddy asks if she needs time to think about it. She’s very nonchalant and doesn’t seem to care much what they do. He gets suspicious and probes a bit as to why she’s not more concerned. She says she gets that they have to operate and it’s OK because the foot will grow back.”
"I had a couple who had been trying to conceive for over two years. I asked all the usual questions, how often do you have sex, any previous pregnancy, etc etc. Something seemed off to me during the consult, so I continued to ask questions. Finally I asked if he ejaculated while inserted into the vagina. Both parties looked confused.Turns out the couple was not having insertional sex at all. I had to awkwardly explain to them how insertional sex works. Diagrams were required.”
"Patient comes in, she’s upset. She’s pregnant, and she doesn’t understand why. She’s on the pill. Upon talking to her at great length, I find out that she only takes the pills on the days that she is sexually active – no other time.”
"Patient comes in with her bf. They are indignant, as if somehow I could’ve prevented [the pregnancy]. The problem? Well, the pills were bothering the girl’s stomach, so, being a gallant bf, he decided to start taking them instead.”
“I was explaining the treatment to the husband of a patient about to be discharged. He kept nodding and agreeing with me, but I knew it was flying over his head. Turned out a fundamental problem was that I was describing the drugs as ‘tablets’ and he had no clue what those were.”This literallyastounds.
But we totally don’t need sexual education in this country.
Nope, abstinence is working just fine.
This is why we need comprehensive sexual education people. - Paige
“Guardians of the Galaxy was such a fantastic movie!”
"There were a lot of issues with GotG that should be addressed and Marvel should work on improving with future movies."
harry potter: “albus severus, blah blah blah slytherin tootle toot fart noise you were named after the bravest man i’ve ever known”
teddy lupin: “hey uh… remember my fucking dad”
[albus arrives at hogwarts]
albus: “hello professor! did you know severus snape? my dad says he was the bravest man he ever knew”
neville longbottom: “is that fucking right”
The Turkish company Pugedon has recently introduced a vending machine that’s an innovative way to help both the environment and our furry friends. It releases food for the city’s stray dogs and cats every time a plastic bottle is deposited, and it allows people to empty their water bottles for the animals as well.
This wonderful service operates at no charge to the city because the recycled plastic pays for the cost of food. So, with a little financial investment, the simple machines do a lot of good. They provide a steady source of sustenance to the animals, many of which rely on caring residents to regularly feed them. It also encourages people to make a habit of recycling and help conserve our environment for future generations.
Put these everywhere
can’t believe snow white’s prince goes to an open casket funeral and is like
and kisses what is presumed to be a corpse
- Mewtwo: i see now that the circumstances of ones birth are irrelevant. it is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are.
- Mew: mew